Tag Archives: Batman

I can’t keep up with Blogs can I?

Yeah…  sorry about the week hiatus. Trying to keep up with the damn blog and keep getting busy or procrastinate! So… What have my readers missed out on…

New Batman Arkham game

Oh… boy, looks like I’m going to avoid this game like the plague. Surprisingly though it’s not being developed by Rocksteady, rather it’s being done by Warner Bros. RockSteady have mentioned that some of their staff are working with Warner Bros to help out with the development. But I already know that this game with have another anticlimactic ending like the other two…  So moving on…

Another Disney Game HD Remake!?

Oh you betcha! This time Disney has teamed up with Sega to recreate Castle of Illusion for Current generation consoles. I hope this turns out to be as good as the original. Though to be honest looking at the pictures they do look a little bit “too different” unlike the faithful looking Duck Tails.

That XCom game getting re-branded!

Yeah, remember a while back when 2K Marin announced a First Person XCom game based in 1950s America? Well if you haven’t noticed the game’s been delayed many, many times… Not to mention the unless amount of XCom fans hating the game’s FPS gameplay. But it was announced that the game’s going to be re-branded as “The Bureau”, and it’ll now have nothing to do with the XCom franchise. Personally I think that’s a shame, I loved the video they showed back in 2010 with it’s fifties Americana style. I mean come on! When’s the last time you played an FPS set in fifties American suburbia!? At least the game have some life left in it, even if the game might not be a part of the XCom franchise any more.

Star Fox Art Book available to look at online?!

Back in the nineties, Nintendo released an awesome art book-stroke-manga on Star Fox. Drawn by Star Fox’s original artist, Benimaru Itoh, it’s an awesome book that features a Manga Comic, and graphic illustrations for Arwings and many other vehicles in the game. The catch was back then it was only released in Japan, and only in short print. Website GlitterBerri has a translation of the Manga portion of the book here. Whilst the whole book can be seen, but in Japanese, at StarFox-online.

Guns of Icarus Online Expansion on Kickstarter!?

Whoo…  I think that’s about it for today! Though I will end this blog with mentioning that my favourite online game; Guns of Icarus Online, is getting a Kickstarter for it’s “Adventure Mode” expansion pack that puts an MMORPG element into the team based Air ship game. The Kickstarter has already beaten it’s first goal of $60K, and it will soon beat it’s new target of $100K! So if you want to add adventure to your Guns of Icarus Online game, go and help them out with a $30 pledge! 🙂

Why I hate the Batman Arkham games!

In 2009, RockSteady Studios released a very hyped up Batman game called Batman Arkham Asylum, that then had a sequel in 2011 called Batman Arkham City. These games got a lot of hype and news, and they were pretty good games for the most part…
So why do you hate them Ian? Well, both of these games are the digital equivalent of watching a great theatrical play, you’ve been watching it for a good two hours and it’s getting near the end, and for whatever reason the lead actor forgets his line and whilst stumbling on his words he trips over something, knocking over a prop that lands on someone, but there’s a thin metallic object on top of said prop that falls over and beheads the actor that was standing next to the actor who’s crushed under the prop; the actor who’s beheaded body stumbles toward the audience and a massive haemorrhage squirts at the audience who freak out and try to flee the theatre in sheer fear as they run over each other, and of course at least one person dies from that. That’s what happens in this game, they have a great beginning, a great middle, and then it turns into a terrible end where you wonder why it had to suck so badly…  Let me explain this…
WARNING: SPOILERS WILL BE USED HERE, SO IF YOU’RE AN ANTI SPOILER SORT OF PERSON, CLOSE THE DAMN WINDOW NOW!

Batman Arkham Asylum

The biggest issue with the ending of Arkham Asylum is that you “fight” Joker. However you don’t need to be a huge comic boffin to know that Joker is a weed compared to the likes of Batman. So how do end the game? Do you use Bruce Wayne’s excellent detective skills to find where the Joker is hiding? Nope. Do you chase a flocking Joker around the Asylum? Nope. Instead you do actually have a fist fight with the Joker. “But how is that even fair if he hasn’t got a gun Ian?”, well here’s RockSteady’s approach towards balancing a fight between the Joker and Batman. Batman visits Bane in the game who’s turned into a psychopath  because Ivy has injected Bane with a special venom that contains a virus called “Titan” that manipulates the human body to turn anyone into a “hulking” beast. See what I did there, “Hulk”, you know, DC… Marvel… Yes I’m a huge nerd get over it. But what happens with this Titan virus? Oh yeah! Joker uses it on himself!
I’m not kidding here, you fight a muscular oversized Joker so that a fist fight between him and the dark knight somewhat balanced…  Well, clearly more in his favour, But that hook shot of yours and his ludicrously long nails put you in a better spot, as you pull him down with the hook shot, causing Titan Joker to fall on his hands, with his long nails stuck in the wooden floor as you pummel his face in. And that’s it. Again, you don’t need to be a comic book buff to understand that this wouldn’t ever happen in the comics or the films, rather Joker would hide as he sends his goons to shoot you, or he would pull a gun on Batman. But no, traditionally in games, the lead protagonist has to beat up the antagonist, so RockSteady had to make a Bane sized Joker for Batman to fight… Thanks for the disappointment guys…

Batman Arkham City

I was dumb enough to buy the first game at full price with an incredibly lack-luster ending, so I was dumb enough to buy the sequel thinking and believing that RockSteady would improve the ending. But I was very wrong, so wrong it might possibly be worse than the first game. How so? Like this…
The plot of Arkham City is that after Joker was taken away from the fight in the first game, the Titan virus is slowly killing him, and now he’s managed to turn all of Gotham City into a villian’s playground as he holds it hostage unless Batman finds him a cure, which a certain Doctor Freeze has been making. However Joker being the total bastard he is infects Batman with the titan virus with a syringe, and there’s only one cure. Batman being smart about this gets hold of Doctor Freezes cure and uses it on himself to prevent dying, but now with a dying Joker in the midst, who will Batman fight as the final boss in this game? Twoface? The Riddler? Ivy? Penguin? Cat Woman? Oh no no, let’s use a better character that everyone knows…!

…Clayface

Yeah…  Everyone knows Clayface right? He’s been used in EVERY FILM AND EVERY TV SHOW. Notice how I’m being sarcastic here…? The biggest problem with Arkham City is that not only do you fight this guy twice, but after defeating him the second time you think you have another hour or two left before you reach the game’s climax. Oh no, you beat the game, and it’s mega anti-climatic! this is the video game equivalent of watching a pretty good film before the film abruptly stops and you’re told to leave as the film equipment isn’t working. What’s sad about that statement was that actually happened to me once and had to go back to the cinema the next day to watch said film that stopped on me. So yeah, you beat Clayface, who I ended up reading up that in the comics that he’s the 73rd greatest Batman villain ever voted by fans…  [sarcasm] Great… that’s an achievement right? [/sarcasm]. What’s makes things worse is that as Batman cured himself with the only titan cure in existence, the Joker dies, and it’s pretty damn bad, it’s like Super Man without Lex Luthor, or Mario without Bowser; Batman and Joker are a match made in heaven despite their sheer hatred for each other. When you think Batman, you can only think of Joker as being his ultimate rival. Think of it like Wily Coyote if he actually caught Roadrunner? Oh wait, Seth MacFarlane made a joke about this…
OK, sure Batman could deal with any one of his bazillion rivals in the next game. Maybe Joker will return from the dead as a zombie or something! I mean come on, almost anything game, TV and or film related now has zombies in it right? Why not the Joker, they have done it to the Marvel heroes at least. It’s bound to happen…
God damnit!